|T O P I C R E V I E W
||Posted - 11 Jan 2008 : 23:49:26
Praise God there exists a forum such as this for Born Again Christians!
I'm from Australia and grew up in a completely anti-christian family. God saved me in 2003 and since then He has been teaching and guiding me at an exponential rate. He even changed the hearts of my family to accept me even though I had been warned all my life I'd be disowned if I became a Christian.
Unfortunately for me, over the past year, I allowed myself to condemn myself due to a very non-christian past and I pulled a "Jonah" when God called me to perform a specific task. As a result, a relationship of over 5 years fell apart at the seams, my grades at uni dropped to a barely passing level and the debt that God had paid off for me has doubled in value. I love God and feel I know Him well, so I knew I was putting myself through the storm - so to speak. I don't blame God and despite my running I still read His word and worship (although now at a different church - even though I still call my home church home).
I understand that I am condemning myself and have been convicted of late to address this issue. However, I am now facing a feeling of shame that I ran away in the first place. Over the past few weeks I have had a series of rather vivid and disrubing dreams. All my life, before I was even born again, God had been talking to me through my dreams - this He explained to me after I was born again. But for the first time since I was saved, God has not given me the understanding of my dreams. I pray that God will give someone else the understanding of these dreams and share them with me.
My mother is yelling loudly at me and blaming me for "conning" my father into making a pointless purchase. She tells me it is all my fault for putting the idea into his head. My father, that she is referring to, actually turns out to be my pastor and the purchase was a CD box set of preaching tapes. Enclosed with the box set is a dove. As my pastor opens the box, the dove flys out and flys around quite peacefully and lands on the head of my pet c**katiel. All of a sudden, I realise the dove has very large claws, larger than the head of my pet c**katiel, which are digging into my pets head and hurting it. I yell out to shoo the dove and protect my c**katiel. The dove seems to grow in size and starts to look more like a pigeon but keeps flying off then landing on my pet c**katiel's head. At this point I am yelling hysterically trying to protect my pet c**katiel. Then the dove goes to fly onto my head. I percieve this to be the Holy Spirit's annointing but out of fright I fight the dove off my head. I scream and yell to my pastor to remove the dove. He comes over and is now clearly furious however his image changes to that of a very large gangster villain that I have seen from a TV show. He catches the dove (that now looks like a mean white pigeon) with one hand and yells at me saying that it was my idea. In his rage, he clenches his fists and inadvertantly kills the dove/pigeon that he had caught in his hand.
I am standing in front of a large platform of which a judge is seated behind. I perceive Him to be God. He says something inaudible and bangs His gavel - however his gavel has two heads. I leave the room and am walking through what I percieve to be some sort of reception or party. I walk out towards the back of the party and into a small house whose interior looks like the inside of a caravan. The lady of the house says I am not welcome, however I force myself in and argue with her that I have a right to be here. She tells me this is her home and that I have no right to come in if she doesn't want me. I negotiate with her to let me in even though I realise I really do not have a right to be there. We sit in a very small and cramped space on some dining room chairs and I recognise this is her lounge room. Sitting behind me is one of my students. She tells me that she doesn't want me here anymore because the last two times she required me I was late. I assume she is talking about me coming to tutor her daughter. I proceed to explain to her that the reason for my lateness was due to my running away from God the previous year. I explain to her in a lot of detail what had happened. At the end of my story, she asks to be excused as she needed to pray with her other three chidren for an excursion. The go outside to pray and even tho I do not see or hear them I join them in prayer from my seat. My student questions me why I prayed, but I do not have an answer.
I am in the house in which I grew up in and it seems we are having a church meeting. There are many testimonies and general sharing between everyone. All the people in attendance are from my home church (where God planted me after I was saved and where I was baptised). Everyone asks my well being and I share how I had been running from God, but they are disinterested. I start to listen to the conversations and realise that the sharing and testimonies are quite worldly and many are not Godly at all. All of a sudden my pastor enters and asks if everyone would like him to put some p**nography on the television in the background while we drink alcoholic spirits with our lunch.
Please be aware that these are my dreams and are not a reflection of my church family at all. In fact I have been so disturbed by these dreams that I have trouble getting to sleep and am concerned with them through the majority of the day. My first reaction to the initial dream was that the Holy Spirit had left me and I was very upset and cried solidly while seeking comfort in God's word.
My prayer is that God gives the understanding to someone so that I may learn and be edified by it.
Thank you and God Bless.
|2 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First)
||Posted - 12 Mar 2013 : 08:43:43
You are indeed young in Christ I think your problems are your dreams God reaches out to us in many ways. I believe you have some insecurities that need to be addressed first of all sudy the word of God get into some solid fellowship join a good bible study you are not a Jonah to God He has seen the movie already He Knows your reactions to everything ahead of time you are no surprise to God He loves you and as long as you seek Him you will have no worries. The fact that He no longer talks to you or gives you interpretations to your dreams does not mean He no longer cares for you rather He is saying its time to grow up a little don't become reliant on dreams to know Me rather search My Word and learn it. When you know it well you will know who you are in Christ. I believe that you see a lot of plasticity in the world something you really no longer want to be a part of because you have, made a commitment to the Lord whom you believe to be more substantial both morally and ethically FEAR NOT you cannot let God down but you can let yourself down and I think you are beating yourself up about it. Your dream reminds me of one of my own that I had early on when I had first made my commitment to the Lord I dreamt I was being chased by a man and his gang of followers I ran to a Christian friends house thinking I would be safe there and hid behind a chair. The man and his evil followers came right into my friends house and held a shot gun to me, at this point I made a stand for myself and for my freedom to follow Christ I grabbed the gun away from the man and pointed it at him and told him to get out of my friends house and to leave me alone. I had no problems after that because I knew I had made a stand for Christ and myself even on a subconscious level and you must too! Take some time for yourself and learn about Him, after all He knows everything about you!
||Posted - 23 Oct 2008 : 20:14:37
You are curious about these which is good...
When reading these I felt God reach out and speak to me... This is what I got from your stories.. NOTE i don't answer number 2 till last of all...
Dream 1: I believe God is saying that your MUM will hold your Dad away from God, but persist and maybe work with your MUM most of all.
The Dove represents the Holy spirit and is killing a problem or most probably and addiction (the c**kateil). The pastor turned Evil because you were throwing the Holy spirit away hence giving the devil free reign, this is bad, this is very bad cause I think by Killing it, the Devil is saying, hey I'm gonna build a barrier and you aint gonna get anywhere with God again...
Dream 3: God is telling you to never tell a fake testimony, he is also saying that you will get over your addiction or problem which I feel may be p**nographic and he wants you to tell your story and make yourself heard, the people who aren't interested are the people who will try and persuade you in the ways of the Devil, he is saying not to talk to individuals but talk to a multitude... IGNORE THEM!!!
Dream 3: This is the Devil not God, he is saying that God turned his back on you (Lady walking away) and by not letting you in he is saying God will stop you, but God has interviened and has let you in anyway...
I believe God is daying he didn't walk out on you, you walked out on him (Start of dream 3, you walked out of the courte room and past the party, which was heaven) He is saying that he wasnts you home and he will help you get over your issues, he wants you to go out and tell many of your story...
I hope this helped you... If you have ANY questions or problems then E-mail straight away, I'm sorry it took so long for God to get me to reply to this...